Many people don’t know this about me but when I was pregnant with Haden I had to make some serious decisions. It was a pretty rough pregnancy.
Let’s start from the beginning: when I had my ultrasound to tell if it was a boy or girl around 20 weeks we were filled with joy to find out we were having a little boy! But then a week later I get a phone call from the doctors office saying they found something in the ultrasound they were concerned about. It appeared that our little boy had more water on his brain than normal. They proceeded to tell me that he has hydrocephalus. We of course had to go in for a follow up ultrasound and were told all the possible effects that hydrocephalus can have including enlarged head, some sort of handicap in learning or worse that would need constant attention, possibly may need surgery to insert a stint to drain some fluid, etc. I was very overwhelmed in a million worries!
My doctor at the time told us that it wasn’t too late to abort if that’s what we chose. He actually encouraged it. I have NEVER believed in abortion but I was actually considering it. I didn’t feel like I could handle a child with disabilities, emotionally or financially. I had to come to terms that I couldn’t stand the thought of ending the life of my child. I also started looking into adoption. Again, I could never give my child away!
After A LOT A LOT of crying and praying I would love my child no matter what and would make it work no matter what. I’m actually holding back tears writing this!
Haden was born months later and he was awesome! He was the most precious baby I’ve seen! The day after he was born he had to have an MRI….again…more crying for mom! I hated seeing my tiny little baby go thru that!!!
We have been to multiple doctors appointments and MRI’s over the past 10 years and my awesome baby boy is perfectly normal! The neurologist can’t believe it! She always said if you just look at his MRI you’d think he’d have all kinds of problems but interacting with him and hearing how he does daily he’s truly a miracle! My little miracle! So often I want to go find that doctor that ENCOURAGED me to end my baby boys life and show him how amazing he is!!!
I do not wish my experience on anyone. Lots of stress and worry but we have been truly blessed with an amazing red headed fiery sweet (sometimes) little boy!
Now he is becoming a polite young man and I am proud to say I’m his mom! And I want to thank my family and friends for helping me get through all the hard times! Love you!